Ok cats and kittens, a word about faith.
A lot of times you hear me talking about having faith, and I really need to take a few minutes to explain it further, and for me I need to also, right now, I would like to. Because of two reasons. One is that this particular faith I mean is not the faith you've heard tell of, which means there is a great deal of misinterpretation that occurs when I drop this word, and sometimes y'all are looking at me like I just morphed into a televangelist, foaming at the mouth and knocking over cryitty baptist ladies in hats with flowers on them. It's a pretty funny look. And I *get* that look. Because the kind of faith that they are talking about is the most bullshit faith imaginable. I'm not saying it doesn't lead you to the faith I'm talking about but just to be clear what I am *not* talking about is the the one where you blindly believe shit you can't see. When I was a kid I was told "faith is believing in something you can't see" or something similar. And that my good friends, is bullshit. Believing in something you can't see and feel is not believing in truth cuzza not only can you see truth, but it's the clearest thing you have ever seen when you see it. All people looking for truth will come to it. This was why I stopped with all the church stuff at a younger age because people kept telling me I should just accept shit and I didn't believe I should. I was all like, "Why are you telling me yours is the only right religion, but also I can't go out and read about other religions, and I should just believe it's right. If your religion is the true truth, I should be able to leave here, walk down the street, talk to every person I see, read every book that exists and still come to that conclusion, on my own. If this is truth, why are you trying to hide anything and everything else?"
This kind of faith -isn't- blind. It will prove itself over and over to you. A million times every fucking day. So first, clear your mind of this idea of some unknowing or convincing of yourself or whatever related to having faith. Or at least the kind I'm talking about. This kind of faith is like a belief you have, but bigger. The beliefs you have that you vibrate. Not the beliefs you'd like to believe. Not the beliefs you talk about, or what those around you believe and you agree with. This kind of faith, very, extremely literally makes *everything* happen. So really it's actually mad, mad important. And this is why I am always talking about it. Because your faith in things, or lack of faith in them, anything, "good" or "bad", I mean any old thing you believe vibrationally, on any old topic, shape the entire life that you live right now.
When you believe something, anything, your brain wants to make you right. If you stop and think about it for a while you might start to see how every person has totally convinced themselves that they have arrived at "right," the real right, about every subject that has ever come up in life so far. Even if their "right" is, "nobody knows the answer to that question, it's just a mystery..." they're still fucking right about that. If you look even a little further you may also see that every person's set of conclusions is totally different. But they'll still feel fully justified for yelling at you over your version. On accounta just how really, really right they are just about this one thing for sure. And don't you see that 6.78 out of the 10.67 cats in this general vicinity agree with me? Surely that should help you see that my conclusion here is really the realliest right one. Do a street survey- about blahitty blah percentile would agree with me. Cool people think I'm right. Don't you see yet, how unright you are? Well now, on this one here, you're so unright Ima stop loving you for a while. Yell a little more. Maybe Ima call my friends and see how unright they think you are and we can feel even righter together. Help me feel more justified in taking my love away, on accounta it doesn't feel very nice. But it feels nicer now when other people agree with me. Oh if I could just get YOU to agree with me, that would feel reeeeally nice I bet, since this thing is so important for me to be right about. So no more talky until you do. You don't even deserve my love until you see it cuz that's how right it is.
And if you look further and furthitty still, veeery far indeed, you *might* be able to see, that even though some of those things you thought were really, reeeeeallly, realllly for reals reals right and reallly, the most terrible, horrible version of wrong that could ever be wrong, and 98.98 percent of non crazy Americans would toootally agree with you, that even *those* beliefs are these kind of beliefs, and qualify in these categories, and are still just the same old reason to stop loving people. And to not be happy right now.
SO. Beliefs you vibrate. They start out like thoughts.
Let's say you took a class in highschool and you had a wee bit of a shite teacher or even a good one who meant well, but for whatever reason, you sucked in that class. Somewhere in like the 3rd week there was this one day where you just realized, hey I don't know if I am gonna do so well in this classitty. It doesn't even matter the reason why. SO let's say this class was a geography class. SO let's say at the end of it, you noticed how you sucked at geography. (Now, I said noticed, on accountat that's how people do it. They spend all their time 'noticing' all these things about themselves, like these characteristics previously existed and gradually we will see all these characteristics about ourselves and memorize them, we memorize the list of noticings, and this is who we are. Or close to that. How close depends on when we notice we know ourselves. So then we'd say all the noticings about ourselves, how our favorite colour is blue and we grew up in this town and we don't like peas and we prefer to wear certain things and our relationship with this one person sucks and this one rocks, for now, and our interests include skiing, good music and child psychology and that's who we are. Bullshit. All bullshit. House of cards. As far as all it is is who we believe we are. Subject to change at any time.) Anyway...
So now you've 'noticed' that you suck at geography, which just means you decide you do. Now the thingitty is, your mind is very powerful, and it wants you to be right. So as you go about your daily business, live the next ten years of your life, collecting evidence supporting your belief that you suck at geography. And it will be there- promise. Someone will ask you a capital you don't know and you'll say "oooh, don't ask me, I suck at geography." And you'll take a note of your 'noticing'. And gradually you are gonna find how much you suck at geography. And indeed you will suck at geography. This is how our brain works. Also how it keeps us "right." It becomes very important to protect those thoughts about who we are. This can work in your favor if the belief is awesome-o. But is decidedly less cool if the belief is destructive.
See once you've said,"if that thing ever happened to me, I don't know what I would do, I'd lose my mind." about ****ANYTHING****, then that's the belief you have introduced into your noticings about who you are. Think about how many things you have said that about things you've heard. Please. Big and small, like "that would annoy the piss out of me" works here too. But I use the mind losing one on accounta it's *so much more dangerous.*
Now- if and when that very thing happens to you, whatever it is, then when you scan your thoughts to find the emotion you should feel (which is the living in thought I am always talking about, happens in the blink of a fucking eye, we mistake this process as naturally reacting to life, but it's only calling up our noticings and matching emotion and then calling forth that emotion, often powerfully, fast-like) you'll of course find that you should feel terrible, and feel terrible, and subsequently lose your fucking mind. Whatever you've decided THAT means. I'm not writing off how serious this is for people. No blame here, what you believe to be the really real truth is fucking powerful. Why do you think it's so awesome when you learn to believe other things?
Now.
Have faith? Yes. Believe with real belief, just as much as you believe those collections of things about yourself, that much belief, in all the awesomest things possible about yourself. In whatever ways you want. The most awesomest things, the beliefs that make you feel the absolute happiest.
The joke is, the funny thing is, what you don't get is, if you started believing everything about yourself that made you the happiest to believe it, RIGHT NOW- you would,
for the first time in your life,
Be actually believing yourself
to be
who
you truly
fucking
ARE.
And believe them about life, too. And your whole world would shift to make it all match up, and since that match would be all that made you the happiest, you'd be stupid fucking happy, and all you did was just believe the best stuff and the most fun stuff about life, and turns out that was true all along, huh, imagine that. Emotions are more than feelings. They are your compass.
So I have faith in my dreams, cuzza how I know, just know, with every fibre of my being, that they can all come true if I want them to. Since it's true. It is Universal law. My true beliefs will change very universe around me. It already has. Oh and I don't know how the fuck I'm going to get there- it doesn't matter, that's not even by job. If I planned it my way it would fuck it all up. The law is too perfect on it's own. I don't have to work out details, I don't have to know how it's all gonna go down. It's much, much simpler than that. Much simpler. For all of us.
The vibration is literally all I have to take care of. How I'm feeling, how I'm believing. The rest will happen on it's own. I know how far that goes against everything you've been taught about how to get things done in this life- but it is true. It is the truth. You don't have to believe me for it to be true, but I would *just* *love* you to. On accounta once you did, you would have everything you want.
When you see this, all of it, in your own life, you won't have to put effort into faith, because you will know. You'll know this is how it works. And you'll be too busy choosing all the fun things to believe and planning every super fun detail of your super fun life to have worries. Any.
Lots of love,
Amber
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