So I just want to say some things I believe about God. You can decide for yourself whether to believe them, they are just suggestions.
God does not judge you. Ever. Flat out. Sin really means, not being totally joyful. And it doesn't mean you are bad or wrong, it just means you are not experiencing God's love, and so have in that way 'separated' yourself in your *experience* from God, and from the Truth, which is that you are part of God. The idea that you can fall out of favor with God to me seems silly. The more I learn about Love, the sillier it seems. In God's eyes each and every single last one of us is perfect, right now. In spiritual Truth, there is no right and wrong, good and bad.
This scares the fucknuts out of a lot of people. People want to believe that Hitler fell out of favor with God. They kind of... need to. They also need to believe it to justify how they've been living. Or how they've been telling you to live. And they want to believe that they are the ultimate judges, and have mapped out an intricate and oh so very sense-making version of what is CLEARLY right and CLEARLY wrong, and what is clearly a grey area and what nobody knows and what you're an idiot if you even THINK you know, and so on. And they believe this with all their being, in fact it is *who they are,* they believe- and so a different idea that seems to so unify us, and in some way equate us all, becomes frightening.
Let me tell you something about this idea of God. I spent a lot of time in my life being a not nice person. And that was when I believed there was this line which I was constantly crossing. That so many failures, failure after failure were defining me as this terrible person, because of what I had been made to believe was terrible. It was when I believed other people were terrible, and that the world was terrible. And the worse it was, and the worse they were, the worse I felt. And I was unhealthy, and I was unhappy, and I was fucking nasty sometimes. And I felt stuck in all these cycles and it just got worse, and worse.
If you think that the idea (Truth) that you can not fall out of favor with God, that you are perfect, RIGHT NOW, as you are, that you yourself are a God, that you are part of God created of God in the image of God, that not for one second in this Lifetime has God ever felt anything but complete and total awe and complete and total Love for the LIFE he Lovingly created of himself- if there's anything in you that rejects this idea,
let me tell you what that idea did for me.
Let me tell you what releasing guilt in my life did for me. Let me tell you what slowly dismantling every tie I ever felt to what anyone thought I should or shouldn't do did for me. Let me tell you what feeling one hundred percent loved, and one hundred percent accepted *even* when not behaving perfectly, when physically completely alone, even when being misunderstood or misread or mistreated- did for me.
When you realize you are made of Love, you will become Love. When you know you are constantly in communion with God, you will feel the presence of Divine Love all around you. All the time. It will bring Peace that passes understanding, within- and so, gradually without. You will bring it with you everywhere, and it will be poured out from you everywhere, and you will see it in all things and people you encounter.
When you feel unconditionally Loved by God it will allow you to begin to unconditionally Love others. All others. Yes, even the really really bad ones. Yes, I know how that sounds. If you believe that you yourself are not in need of forgiveness, it can't stop with anybody. With any Life. When you start to know God's unending, unyielding Love, you will start to understand that. And you will be compelled to show that Love to others. You won't be able to live any other way. You will also begin to be unconditionally loving toward yourself.
When you begin to love and accept yourself exactly as you are, you will give yourself permission to be happy always. You will stop being afraid. People who are becoming Love are becoming less afraid. People who are wholly Love are wholly unafraid. Being happy always coincides with making others happy. Which coincides with being Loving, always. That is what the idea that there is no 'wrong' did for me. It hasn't made me feel like I can guiltlessly be a shithead. It has made me want to be Loving always. It has made me want to live a life that honors and shares and exemplifies the Love God has for me, and for all of us, always.
When you are loving always, you are forgiving always. The idea that God sees you as perfect and holy can give you the power to forgive others, always. As you let go of your unforgiveness, Love fills the space. God fills it. And this has a tremendous affect on your physical Life. Believing you are worthy of Love will begin to make you understand you are also worthy of the greatest that this life has to offer, in every facet, without exception, *right now.* God thinks you are. And he will show you this by making your Life better than anything you ever dreamed possible, once you understand your own worthiness, and his Love for you. Which leads to recognizing this worthiness in everyone you encounter, and to Loving them.
When you see God's Love for you reflected in everyone and in everything, and your experience is filled with joy, you will be seeing the world through the eyes of God. Where it is paradise.
God loves you no matter what, so be happy.
All God's Love and Mine,
-Amber
